2 years still lost

first year together

Not a day goes by that i don’t think of all of our fun times, fun adventures and everything in between. You saved me when I didn’t even know I needed saving. I will forever be greatful to you because i found myself but losing you I lost myself all over again.

You made me believe I was enough, I was beautiful, I was worth more than the life I was given, I was special and so much more. I had a life with you for 4 and a half years, I loved you and I loved all of you every mistake, every weird thng we said EVERYTHING.

year 2, The day you gave me my promise ring

You left almost 2 years ago, I lost my best friend, my person, my world and my whole life. I was lost when you left and not a day goes by that i feel complety whole again. I loved you and I will forveer love you. I need to find my happiness again and my heart and just be whole. You taught me how to hold and shoot a gun. How to drive a tractor, mow and weed eat grass. How to change my oil, How to change an air filter in a house, how to do alot of things i couldn’t list it all. You showed me so much about life I didn’t know I was missing, it was hard, we fought because I get frusterated easily but we always had a laugh after, we always kissed and made up. We never went to bed mad and if we tried one of us would do smething funny to break the silnece or a dog would do something and we would be in awe since they were our kids after all. You made me so dang happy just by being by myside, threw infertilty, losing babies and losing my mind in school and long work days. I can’t say thank you enough thats for sure.

Year 3 and 4

I never knew what i did wrong. I was always there, i gave up so much and lost more. I didn’t get to be the crazy 21 year old beacsue of you and i was okay with that we agreed to it. I tried to be everything and anything you needed.

Last pisture, a month before it all went away.

I ask myself why, what, when, why and how so much. Ask anyone, I still to this day feel like nothing at times, lost at times and worthless at times. I want you to know that I don’t balme you for anything, I don’t hate you and I do love you. Like i said before to you plenty of times forever and always.

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